Stealing this from Meg over at Lying for a Living…
1. Demonstrated how stretchy and strong condoms are by putting them over your fist. In front of 30 strangers, while you were teaching a class. At rehab. I also did this at a Tina Turner Concert.
2. Had a friend call you from the Syphilis Prevention conference and say “I have vomit in my hair, I’m naked except for my panties and they are on inside out, and there is a guy in bed next to me – do you think I fucked him?”
3. Went to 10 different schools in 12 years.
4. Had sex with a college boyfriend’s best friend, but not with the actual boyfriend. Pretty sure the actual boyfriend was gay.
5. Have so many relatives with birthdays that are the same day but different months (seriously, there are like 10 of us)
6. Made a D in Honors Geometry.
7. Was in Trafalgar Square for the Millenial New Year (“A lot of people get drunk and scream!”)
8. Been accused of having an affair with a co-worker that I wasn’t having an affair with, but he was having an affair with another guy and I was a convenient distraction for his wife and friends.
9. Started wearing a bra in 1st grade.
10. Called your 4th grade teacher a bitch on the school bus and get busted for it!
How about you?
These are great!
I am in awe of you over #1. And WHAT happened with #2? Hysterical.
By: nova on January 24, 2008
at 7:45 am
Nova-
Thanks!
With #1, I almost always have some guy tell me that condoms are too small for him. So I take out a regular one and put it on over my fist and arm and say “Are you packing something like this?” and every one laughs and then I open up my hand and say “I’m pretty sure you can make it work, if I can do THIS!” and they shut up and look kind of sad. It’s the best thing about teaching HIV prevention!
#2, It was my slutty single friend – she had a bit too much to drink and had no idea what was going on. I was like “Dude, seriously, you are at the SYPHILIS conference. Don’t be stupid!” But I think it was too late for her to heed my very sage advice.
Heather
By: Heather on January 24, 2008
at 9:24 am
You’re definitely right – I haven’t done any of these!
Leonard
By: Leon Blumfeld on January 25, 2008
at 1:56 am
Leonard-
It was fun putting it together…in a world where so many of us share similar stories, it was challenging finding things that are unique to me.
Thanks for coming by – I hope you will be back!!
Heather
By: Heather on January 25, 2008
at 7:17 am
Heather, all I have to say about #1 is: AWESOME.
By: nova on January 25, 2008
at 8:42 am
Nova,
My parents are sooooo proud!!
By: Heather on January 25, 2008
at 8:47 am
I can’t say that I’ve done any of those either, although you probably aren’t surprised. However, I did spray paint myself in the face last week. And then accidentally ingest furniture stripper this week. (Been doing home improvement projects, needless to say I’m not that good at it
).
By: krkbaker on January 26, 2008
at 9:25 am
Kim, seriously. That scares me! Be safe. Furniture stripper is not an acceptable subsitute for vodka!!
Good to see you around!
Heather
By: Heather on January 26, 2008
at 12:12 pm
OMG! Very nice list. Looks like a good place to restart writing a bit…
By: introspeculative on February 1, 2008
at 7:55 pm
Dude! Seriously!
So glad to see you back – I’d love to see your list!
Heather
By: Heather on February 1, 2008
at 8:04 pm
[...] February 1, 2008 Took the lead from Heather over at Extemporaneous [...]
By: 10 Things I have done that you probably haven’t « Introspeculative’s Collection of Oddities on February 1, 2008
at 8:33 pm
Reminded me of something I did once. It involved biting and a nipple. Oh, and a hard slap in the face.
By: Jim on June 18, 2008
at 11:24 am
Biting nipples – totally in. Face slapping, well, not so much.
CHeck out my friend Tess’s blog – Urban Gypsy on the sidebar. She likes that!
H
By: Heather on June 19, 2008
at 7:48 am